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Tag: gender

Published on Leave a comment on Forgiveness

I preached on the unmerciful servant from Matthew 18 last Sunday.  (I'll post it up when the audio comes available).  Let me give one reflection on how the whole subject was received...

There were two groups of response.  Group A were those who struggled to forgive (I was expecting that).  But I was surprised there was also group B - those who longed to be released by unforgiving friends and relatives.  Now take a wild stab in the dark - what gender do you think were all the members of Group A?  And what gender do you think were all the members of Group B?

Why do women and men seem to struggle with forgiveness in different ways?  These are wild generalisations but, what are blogs for eh?...

Thought 1 - women are often more open relationally and therefore the wounds go deeper

Thought 2 - reconciliation will be more costly for women where there's a higher expectation of openness in the future.

Thought 3 - mostly when we "forgive" we don't write off people's debt we write off the people.  This false forgiveness goes a lot more unnoticed among men than women.

I have other things to say on forgiveness, but do you have other thoughts on this seeming gender disparity?

13

Published on 13 Comments on Models of Masculinity

I first posted this after attending the 2009 London Men's Convention.  I'm genuinely looking forward to the 2011 London Men's Convention (with Mark Driscoll!) and will be going with 25 guys from our church.  I'm sure I'll learn loads and be encouraged.  But I'll still be asking the same questions I did two years ago...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's an age-old question, but it's taken the Flight of the Conchords to pose it again with aching poignancy:

What man?  Which man?  Who's the man?
When's a man a man?
What makes a man a man?
Am I a man?
Yes... technically I am.

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[youtube="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDPg2Lmj9nA"]

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On reflection there were two models of masculinity on show at the London Men's Convention on Saturday.

The first was communicated in mainly non-verbal ways.  As John has put it, there was, at times, a 'Top Gear' spirituality (Top Gear is a popular British TV programme where middle aged men salivate over an array of sports cars).  You can guess the kinds of things - jokes about sports teams, jokes about baldness (lots of them!), jokes about scrotums.  All the usual stuff.  There was an uncomfortable insistence on making fun of the main speaker (Tim Keller) in a laddish kind of, 'Hey, you big bald son of a gun.  Not much hair on you is there? Baldy.  You big bald son of a bald man. Ha!'  That kind of thing.   Graciously Keller did not call down bear attacks as was his right as prophet of the LORD.  Now that really would have sorted out the men from the boys.

(Just as an aside - British men, the cruelty that passes for 'banter' among men is quite shocking for foreigners to cope with.  On one hand I speak as someone who's lived here half his life and, for better and for worse, speaks the lingo.  I also speak as an Australian male.  But I confess that even we hard-headed convicts gape in wonder at the incessant jibes about 'Fatty' and 'Who ate all the pies?' when the man in question is only slightly overweight.  Or 'baldy', when we're really dealing with a high forehead.  Or - and I dare not even name what red-heads are called in this country.  I would try to dissuade anyone with auburn hair or lighter from stepping foot in the British Isles.  The word "Ginger" could be followed by any number of appellations, most of them four-letter.  And this kind of culture is rife in the church too.  Last night in the pub I heard two Christian men speak about another Christian friend in shockingly unChristian ways.  But it was completely in keeping with this lads culture.)

Under this first model of masculinity we're told that we have a God given masculinity to be lived out.  Which is true.  We're told what a huge problem it is when men aren't real men.  Which is true.  But then it's basically assumed that everyone knows what a real man is.

So Mark Driscoll bemoans the prevalence of 'chickified' men in church.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSrZVF3FEUQ]

Apparently the real men are those "watching a ball game, making money, climbing a mountain, shooting a gun, or working on their truck."  And these are the men that are getting it done in the world.  So Driscoll wants these kind of men in the church.

Well.  Alright.  It'd be great to have them in church.  And yes, in some limited sense they'd make a welcome change from the other kind of false masculinity that abounds.  But let's be clear - all natural masculinity is wicked.  Masculinity as it occurs in its natural state is horribly and dangerously perverted.  Whether the perversion occurs in the cowardly retreat direction or the aggressive domination direction, it's a perversion.

The other model of masculinity came in Keller's talk on the cross.  He took us to Gethsemane where Jesus was at His wits end, craving the support of friends, crying, sweating blood contemplating the cross.  The furnace of God's wrath lay ahead of Him.  He begged His Father for another way.  But there was no other way to save us.  The prospect was simple: It was Him or us.  And so Jesus said 'Father, Let it be me.'

That's a man.

Laying down His life for others, bearing shame in their place, accepting weakness to strengthen them.  None of these things looked impressive.  He looked like a total failure, naked and choking to death on a cross.  He did not look manly.   And men from all sides told Him so.  They had all sorts of opinions about what Jesus needed to do to be a real man.  They were all wrong.  He reigned from that tree.  Here was the manliest thing ever done.

And it has nothing to do with back-slapping dudesmanship.  It's not about being mechanical or sports-loving.  And it's not threatened by aesthetic sensitivity or quiet thoughtfulness.  It's defined by heart-felt, loving, sacrificial service.  It's stepping into the roles Christ has for us and saying 'My life for yours.  My weakness for your strength.  Father, Let it be me.'

Oh for real men!  Oh to be a real man.  But not like those 'real men' we're told to be.

More posts on masculinity:

Three thoughts on headship

He said - She said

Is the fruit of the Spirit too sissy for real men?

What real men look like

Larry Crabb on gender

Spouse speak

Arian misogyny

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53

Published on 53 Comments on God is not triune – the Devil's great lie. Part 3

This is the third of a three part article by Rich Owen,
minister at City Evangelical Church, Leeds.

 

In the first post, we saw how the creation was a magnificent preach. It’s pinnacle moment was in the creation of a uniquely vivid image and witness to the Divine Life, Man and Woman. A loving community of persons, ordered, relational, loving and *echad* in union.

Then we saw how Satan moved in to destroy that witness. His plan to seize power was to break this image. Corrupt the Doctrine of God and it all falls down into his greedy hands.

So today we will reflect on this:  The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devils work.

Jesus is the dazzling, glorious and eternal image of the Invisible God. He is the Lord, the Living Word, the eternal expression of the Father, the Anointed One. So how does he pulverise Satan’s head?

The Angel of the Lord who ascends and descends in heaven’s fire, the Living Rock upon whom and in whom all creation holds together, this time descends as baby.

He sums up the human race into himself, assuming, owning, taking responsibility for humanity’s sinful self-love. He came from the Father’s side and became incarnate of the virgin Mary, fully divine, fully human so that as an Adam, He could live a human life from beginning to end in total devotion to his Father and in totally ecstatic (that is, out from Himself) love, a love for the poisoned race of Adam.

Satan even presented him with his master plan. Do what Adam did. Take your lead from another, one who is not your head… me. Take my lead and serve yourself. Become like me, a needy monad. A power hungry, glory seeking parasite and give yourself what YOU want.

But He destroyed the Devils work. He continued to love, He continued to do his Father’s will. He continued to pour himself out even to death, delighting even in that moment in his Father and with joy in His great heart as He considered His eternal inheritance! A Bride. A new Eve!

He wasn’t going to betray who He is. After His resurrection, He carried on. At His Father’s command, He breathed out His Spirit onto the old Adam so that it could be joined to the new. The loving Two sent out the Third. And they gave out the Third. The Living God went forth and multiplied!

The Father gives us the Son. The Son gives us the Father. The Father and the Son give us the Spirit and the Spirit gives us to the Father, in the Son.

He set His love upon the unlovely, so that the unlovely could be made lovely in Him.

So lets draw some points for rumination:

  • The Trinity is the gospel. God’s triune life is good news for a monadic, image-of-Satan world.
  • The life of God is love - other centred, generously giving love
  • Satan wants you to believe God is not loving, and not Triune. That’s all.

So perhaps you might want to ruminate in the following direction. Knowing is not enough. Live it:

  • Are you Trinitarian?  I don’t mean in theory, but in practice. Do you read, preach and speak as a Trinitarian? Reading the OT as a Trinitarian will minister to your soul and give such freshness and light to your study as you never had before. Remember – God didn’t suddenly declare his Trinitarian nature 2000 years ago in Bethlehem. He declared it when He spoke in Genesis 1.
  • Do you give yourself in love to others? If you are married do you serve, love and cherish, *know* and delight in your spouse?  Whether married or not, do you give yourself to those who are not like you – in church and where you live and work? Do you go out of yourself, seeking to beatify and serve the really nasty people? The “chavs”, the office weirdo? Do you do the unglamorous jobs at church *because* there is no glory for *you* – putting the chairs out, washing the cups, cleaning the loos?

Know and live the Trinitarian life. Image Him – be who you ARE.

53

Published on 53 Comments on God is not triune – the Devil’s great lie. Part 3

This is the third of a three part article by Rich Owen,
minister at City Evangelical Church, Leeds.

 

In the first post, we saw how the creation was a magnificent preach. It’s pinnacle moment was in the creation of a uniquely vivid image and witness to the Divine Life, Man and Woman. A loving community of persons, ordered, relational, loving and *echad* in union.

Then we saw how Satan moved in to destroy that witness. His plan to seize power was to break this image. Corrupt the Doctrine of God and it all falls down into his greedy hands.

So today we will reflect on this:  The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devils work.

Jesus is the dazzling, glorious and eternal image of the Invisible God. He is the Lord, the Living Word, the eternal expression of the Father, the Anointed One. So how does he pulverise Satan’s head?

The Angel of the Lord who ascends and descends in heaven’s fire, the Living Rock upon whom and in whom all creation holds together, this time descends as baby.

He sums up the human race into himself, assuming, owning, taking responsibility for humanity’s sinful self-love. He came from the Father’s side and became incarnate of the virgin Mary, fully divine, fully human so that as an Adam, He could live a human life from beginning to end in total devotion to his Father and in totally ecstatic (that is, out from Himself) love, a love for the poisoned race of Adam.

Satan even presented him with his master plan. Do what Adam did. Take your lead from another, one who is not your head… me. Take my lead and serve yourself. Become like me, a needy monad. A power hungry, glory seeking parasite and give yourself what YOU want.

But He destroyed the Devils work. He continued to love, He continued to do his Father’s will. He continued to pour himself out even to death, delighting even in that moment in his Father and with joy in His great heart as He considered His eternal inheritance! A Bride. A new Eve!

He wasn’t going to betray who He is. After His resurrection, He carried on. At His Father’s command, He breathed out His Spirit onto the old Adam so that it could be joined to the new. The loving Two sent out the Third. And they gave out the Third. The Living God went forth and multiplied!

The Father gives us the Son. The Son gives us the Father. The Father and the Son give us the Spirit and the Spirit gives us to the Father, in the Son.

He set His love upon the unlovely, so that the unlovely could be made lovely in Him.

So lets draw some points for rumination:

  • The Trinity is the gospel. God’s triune life is good news for a monadic, image-of-Satan world.
  • The life of God is love - other centred, generously giving love
  • Satan wants you to believe God is not loving, and not Triune. That’s all.

So perhaps you might want to ruminate in the following direction. Knowing is not enough. Live it:

  • Are you Trinitarian?  I don’t mean in theory, but in practice. Do you read, preach and speak as a Trinitarian? Reading the OT as a Trinitarian will minister to your soul and give such freshness and light to your study as you never had before. Remember – God didn’t suddenly declare his Trinitarian nature 2000 years ago in Bethlehem. He declared it when He spoke in Genesis 1.
  • Do you give yourself in love to others? If you are married do you serve, love and cherish, *know* and delight in your spouse?  Whether married or not, do you give yourself to those who are not like you – in church and where you live and work? Do you go out of yourself, seeking to beatify and serve the really nasty people? The “chavs”, the office weirdo? Do you do the unglamorous jobs at church *because* there is no glory for *you* – putting the chairs out, washing the cups, cleaning the loos?

Know and live the Trinitarian life. Image Him – be who you ARE.

1

Published on 1 Comment on God is not triune – the Devil’s great lie. Part 2

This is the second of a three part article by Rich Owen,
minister at City Evangelical Church, Leeds.

 

Since their arrival, what has humanity only ever experienced from God? Love! Generous, outward focused, other centred, creative love

Their great commission – “from your oneness you must create, love, cherish send out more and look after it, look after all this garden. Do you best for it so that all of the life you give and the love you have is like mine for you. You are my image. Just don’t eat from that tree over there, the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.”

And so Satan makes his move on Eve and Adam. Not Adam and Eve, Eve and Adam. This is part of Satan’s plan to corrupt the image, to pervert the world’s view of God away from how He really is.

Jesus says that He does His Father’s will. Not the other way round. The Father wills, the Son does.  The Father speaks out his Word. The Word is from the Father’s side. Not the other way round. In other words, the Father is the head of the Son.

And so Satan’s plan to corrupt the image begins. He is so crafty, so skilled at this. There are so many layers of evil to this terrible moment in history. Can he get the image of the Son to command the image of the Father? Can he trick Eve into being the head of Adam?

The insipid corruption of God’s image and witness is looming. Headship and order were being threatened. But it’s not happened yet. This isn’t the seat of corruption, just a fruit which comes later.

Here is the seat of corruption. Eve sees that this fruit is *desirable* for gaining wisdom. There is a *desire* which rises in her which is not for Adam and not for the Lord God. The desire was to gain wisdom for herself.

A new love, a new desire had entered. It was a perverted love… an inverted love. It went against the flow. It was not outward but inward. It was unnatural and ungodly. The corruption began. Satan was achieving what he set out to do. He sparked in Eve an new love, a wicked invader.

The image was now self loving, self obsessed and so she threw off her role, gave the fruit to Adam and he too acceded. An ungodly love lead to an ungodly action. The corruption was complete.

Eve, and her husband after her, set their desires and affections onto something which was entirely outside this created order and image. Sin had entered and ravaged the great image and witness to the loving, creating and ordered community of Three Divine Persons.

As soon as their love went in instead of out, they felt shame. They hid from the Word of Lord.

Just meditate on the shattering moment. They hid from the Word of the Lord.

The world now had a witness which was self loving, not other loving, a witness which has no concern for order and headship – in other words, an independent monadic witness. The world now had a witness which went solitary and which removed itself from The Divine Life. Satan introduced unitarianism to the world.

And the consequences flowed.

Adam *blamed* Eve. Prior to this Adam only ever *knew* Eve. He loved, nurtured, served, lead and rejoiced in Eve knowing her intimately through sexual union. But now he blamed her. He *accused* her.  He now bore the image of an accuser, not of the Living God.  Adam on his own looked like Satan now.

This is the great crime of the fall. A massive corruption of the Doctrine of God. A Satanic collapse.

So do we see what it is that Satan does?

He leads people to loves and desires which are inward in focus.  He wants to draw your affections away from the Triune God and to self satisfaction, self gratification. Self love. He wants you to think of yourself as an island – solitary and your own source of order.

Why? Because he hates God.

Satan wants to corrupt your view of God. That is all. Once he does that, he has you. You are now his child, you bear his image, you live his life.

More tomorrow...

Published on Leave a comment on God is not triune – the Devil's great lie. Part 2

This is the second of a three part article by Rich Owen,
minister at City Evangelical Church, Leeds.

 

Since their arrival, what has humanity only ever experienced from God? Love! Generous, outward focused, other centred, creative love

Their great commission – “from your oneness you must create, love, cherish send out more and look after it, look after all this garden. Do you best for it so that all of the life you give and the love you have is like mine for you. You are my image. Just don’t eat from that tree over there, the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.”

And so Satan makes his move on Eve and Adam. Not Adam and Eve, Eve and Adam. This is part of Satan’s plan to corrupt the image, to pervert the world’s view of God away from how He really is.

Jesus says that He does His Father’s will. Not the other way round. The Father wills, the Son does.  The Father speaks out his Word. The Word is from the Father’s side. Not the other way round. In other words, the Father is the head of the Son.

And so Satan’s plan to corrupt the image begins. He is so crafty, so skilled at this. There are so many layers of evil to this terrible moment in history. Can he get the image of the Son to command the image of the Father? Can he trick Eve into being the head of Adam?

The insipid corruption of God’s image and witness is looming. Headship and order were being threatened. But it’s not happened yet. This isn’t the seat of corruption, just a fruit which comes later.

Here is the seat of corruption. Eve sees that this fruit is *desirable* for gaining wisdom. There is a *desire* which rises in her which is not for Adam and not for the Lord God. The desire was to gain wisdom for herself.

A new love, a new desire had entered. It was a perverted love… an inverted love. It went against the flow. It was not outward but inward. It was unnatural and ungodly. The corruption began. Satan was achieving what he set out to do. He sparked in Eve an new love, a wicked invader.

The image was now self loving, self obsessed and so she threw off her role, gave the fruit to Adam and he too acceded. An ungodly love lead to an ungodly action. The corruption was complete.

Eve, and her husband after her, set their desires and affections onto something which was entirely outside this created order and image. Sin had entered and ravaged the great image and witness to the loving, creating and ordered community of Three Divine Persons.

As soon as their love went in instead of out, they felt shame. They hid from the Word of Lord.

Just meditate on the shattering moment. They hid from the Word of the Lord.

The world now had a witness which was self loving, not other loving, a witness which has no concern for order and headship – in other words, an independent monadic witness. The world now had a witness which went solitary and which removed itself from The Divine Life. Satan introduced unitarianism to the world.

And the consequences flowed.

Adam *blamed* Eve. Prior to this Adam only ever *knew* Eve. He loved, nurtured, served, lead and rejoiced in Eve knowing her intimately through sexual union. But now he blamed her. He *accused* her.  He now bore the image of an accuser, not of the Living God.  Adam on his own looked like Satan now.

This is the great crime of the fall. A massive corruption of the Doctrine of God. A Satanic collapse.

So do we see what it is that Satan does?

He leads people to loves and desires which are inward in focus.  He wants to draw your affections away from the Triune God and to self satisfaction, self gratification. Self love. He wants you to think of yourself as an island – solitary and your own source of order.

Why? Because he hates God.

Satan wants to corrupt your view of God. That is all. Once he does that, he has you. You are now his child, you bear his image, you live his life.

More tomorrow...

Published on Leave a comment on God is not triune – the Devil's great lie. Part 1

This is the first of a three part article by Rich Owen,
minister at City Evangelical Church, Leeds.

Why is it that the Devil attacks Christian marriage? Well, it’s the same reason that he is the head of the Unitarian Church. The Devil wants the world to believe that God is not Triune. That is pretty much what his work boils down to. That is why he attacks marriage in the church, that is why he seeks to build a unitarian edifice within the Christian church.

Give them the wrong view of god, and they get me – that’s how Satan is seeking to win the world to himself.

Over the next three days, I’ll give a few thoughts on this. We’ll lay a foundation for truth starting with the genesis of love, then secondly, how Satan seeks to undermine this in the genesis of the lie and thirdly some reflections and pastoral musings.

So lets kick off with what happened back in the Garden in Genesis 1-3.

In chapters 1 and 2, we have the glorious description of the creation of mankind, male and female, the image of the Living God.  So first comes the man. He is placed by the Lord God in the garden that God had personally planted. A garden appealing to the eye and good for food. What a great place to be!

But it wasn’t good.

It is not good for man to be alone. He can’t image the Living God on his own. He can’t work in the garden on his own.  So the Lord God took woman from the man’s side just as the Son comes from the Fathers side so that the image would be true.

The man says “this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh”.  Or to paraphrase, the woman is the same as me – she is just like me – of one being and substance because she comes from my side, in the likeness of my Father and his Son.

And how is this likeness expressed?  For this reason and man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and they will become one flesh.  Different and distinct persons, equally human – of the same stuff - and God says for this reason, one flesh.  And the oneness is expressed in the deepest emotional, relational and physical reality that you can have – sexual union.

The majestic union of flesh – a profound joining of the persons as one – echad just as the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are echad.

Adam and Eve are then immediately charged with their task. Procreate! Bring forth a third! Let this love and unity send out another, just as the Father and Son send the Spirit.

The love between man and woman isn’t a sugar-coated, “get a room” kind of love which is shut off to the outside world. No, their outward focused love keeps flowing out and onto a third. Out of their union comes the offspring, the third person.

Only AFTER the charge to procreate are they then tasked with subduing and ruling. The out-flowing, increasing love of man and woman and their offspring gives birth to dominion.  Dominion is a function of love and is a community activity.

But before they go off to work, the Lord God has one more thing left to do. Day seven, the holy day, the day which is set apart for rest.

Are we to imagine after all this that God intended to spend this rest day on His own? I don’t think so.

The Word of the Lord takes a brisk walk in the cool of the day, looking for his beloved image bearers. That seems to be natural to the out flowing, other centred life which the creation story has already spoken of.  Jesus says come to me and I will give you rest. Rest is relational.

The One who speaks out the Word, this Personal Word Himself and the Brooding Spirit want to spend time fellowshipping with the created image, man and woman and they deliberately set a day apart to do this.

I get lost in a haze of wonder at this thought. Imagine the joy! What did they talk about? What was it like? What fellowship! What love! And what a venue!

But this is the context for chapter 3. This is the world which was very good, the life which was very good. It is into this world and this life of fellowship that the serpent slithers in. “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?”

More tomorrow...

2

Published on 2 Comments on God is not triune – the Devil’s great lie. Part 1

This is the first of a three part article by Rich Owen,
minister at City Evangelical Church, Leeds.

Why is it that the Devil attacks Christian marriage? Well, it’s the same reason that he is the head of the Unitarian Church. The Devil wants the world to believe that God is not Triune. That is pretty much what his work boils down to. That is why he attacks marriage in the church, that is why he seeks to build a unitarian edifice within the Christian church.

Give them the wrong view of god, and they get me – that’s how Satan is seeking to win the world to himself.

Over the next three days, I’ll give a few thoughts on this. We’ll lay a foundation for truth starting with the genesis of love, then secondly, how Satan seeks to undermine this in the genesis of the lie and thirdly some reflections and pastoral musings.

So lets kick off with what happened back in the Garden in Genesis 1-3.

In chapters 1 and 2, we have the glorious description of the creation of mankind, male and female, the image of the Living God.  So first comes the man. He is placed by the Lord God in the garden that God had personally planted. A garden appealing to the eye and good for food. What a great place to be!

But it wasn’t good.

It is not good for man to be alone. He can’t image the Living God on his own. He can’t work in the garden on his own.  So the Lord God took woman from the man’s side just as the Son comes from the Fathers side so that the image would be true.

The man says “this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh”.  Or to paraphrase, the woman is the same as me – she is just like me – of one being and substance because she comes from my side, in the likeness of my Father and his Son.

And how is this likeness expressed?  For this reason and man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and they will become one flesh.  Different and distinct persons, equally human – of the same stuff - and God says for this reason, one flesh.  And the oneness is expressed in the deepest emotional, relational and physical reality that you can have – sexual union.

The majestic union of flesh – a profound joining of the persons as one – echad just as the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are echad.

Adam and Eve are then immediately charged with their task. Procreate! Bring forth a third! Let this love and unity send out another, just as the Father and Son send the Spirit.

The love between man and woman isn’t a sugar-coated, “get a room” kind of love which is shut off to the outside world. No, their outward focused love keeps flowing out and onto a third. Out of their union comes the offspring, the third person.

Only AFTER the charge to procreate are they then tasked with subduing and ruling. The out-flowing, increasing love of man and woman and their offspring gives birth to dominion.  Dominion is a function of love and is a community activity.

But before they go off to work, the Lord God has one more thing left to do. Day seven, the holy day, the day which is set apart for rest.

Are we to imagine after all this that God intended to spend this rest day on His own? I don’t think so.

The Word of the Lord takes a brisk walk in the cool of the day, looking for his beloved image bearers. That seems to be natural to the out flowing, other centred life which the creation story has already spoken of.  Jesus says come to me and I will give you rest. Rest is relational.

The One who speaks out the Word, this Personal Word Himself and the Brooding Spirit want to spend time fellowshipping with the created image, man and woman and they deliberately set a day apart to do this.

I get lost in a haze of wonder at this thought. Imagine the joy! What did they talk about? What was it like? What fellowship! What love! And what a venue!

But this is the context for chapter 3. This is the world which was very good, the life which was very good. It is into this world and this life of fellowship that the serpent slithers in. “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?”

More tomorrow...

Published on Leave a comment on Husbands love, Wives respect

From Emma's Blog:

Just before my hubby and I got married, we met up for dinner with a vicar friend of ours, what's known in the trade as a 'wise old chief'. He's just finished saying grace when, mid-fork, he grabbed Glen and I by the wrist and eyeballed us in a steely glare.

'Emma', he barked. 'Respect your husband. Praise him'

He turned to Glen and continued,
'Glen - love your wife. Never, never, never put her down'.

And with that, his eyebrows relaxed and he dropped our now limp wrists. 'Pass the salt'...

Read the whole thing here.


Published on Leave a comment on Good Girl, Party Girl, Tough Girl

Really great post from Emma, drawing on a model of Dan Allender's - femininity goes awry in three directions:

good girl,
party girl,
tough girl.

After describing the types, Emma offers a way forwards:

.

 

Redemption, however, is not sweeping aside every aspect of our good/partying/tough personalities but making us more of our true selves not less.  The good girl who wanted to be “sweet” and “nice” is now a true blessing because she has the courage to be strong as well as kind.  The party girl who was “wild” now knows the fulfilment of her drives in Christ’s love as her passion for life includes and infects others.  The tough girl who closed down and drove forwards has a new softness as she recognizes that her dependence is part of what makes her a genuine leader.

Can you see these ‘types’ in yourself?  What would the redemption of those patterns look like?

Go and have your say...

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