On the Cruciform God thing - here's a brilliant sermon by Darrell Johnson on these same issues. His text is Phil 2:5-11 and his title: "So that's what it means to be God!"
The real realization is not "Oh, Jesus is the god I'd always believed in!" - how's that for fitting the Saviour onto a Procrustean bed! No, the real realization is "Oh, God is nothing like I'd thought - He's who I see in Jesus!"