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Tag: pastoral theology

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Published on 16 Comments on Personality, temperament, gifts, huh?

Codepoke made this comment on my last post on "personality types"

Still conflicted. :-)

If the Spirit has gifted you as a pastor and you torture yourself trying to prophecy, you have not benefited anyone. Some are eyes and some are feet. When the eye tries to do its part in the body by being walked on, good things do not happen to the eye or to the body. Taking guidance from a foot, savoring our food with our hands, and balancing the checkbook with our tongues would all be egalitarian but not spiritual.

Yes it’s possible to err with the personality message, but it’s possible to err with spiritual gifts too. It makes no more sense to throw the one out than the other.

If Jesus made the evergreen and the deciduous tree, should the deciduous tree feel guilty for not being always green? And if Jesus made one man an NF and the other an SJ will He iconoclastically make both into the “perfect” neutral personality?

Good points!

Let me make a couple of clarifications:

1) The trinity tells me that difference in no way compromises one-ness / equality.  One of my hobby horses is to allow the Persons to be considered in all their distinctiveness and not let them be dissolved into some common essence.  Humanity made in the image of this God will wonderfully reflect these distinctions.  Difference is not at all a bad thing!

2) There is definitely such a thing as natural temperament - ie a way that this Trinue God has made me.  Pre-fall and post-return we will still be gloriously different from one another and should not bemoan this fact but rejoice in it. The 'perfect' personality is certainly not 'neutral.'

3) There are definitely different Spirit-given gifts that do not work against unity but are in fact an expression of our unity - even in all our distinctness. (cf 1 Cor 12)

Posts like this one have me banging the drum for all these points.

4) There are spiritual gifts that specially equip certain people to serve the body in particular ways. 

5)  Having said this, we all have certain responsibilities to uphold even if we don't have that gifting.  Some have the gift of service (Rom 12:7) but all should serve.  Some have the gift of 'contributing to the needs of others' (Rom 12:8) but all should give.  Some have the gift of evangelism (Eph 4:11) but all should play their part in evangelism.  Some have the gift of administation (1 Cor 12:28) but all have admin to do, etc. 

6) I can bring my giftings and differentness to bear in a very rich way upon the tasks I'm called to do.  I will serve differently to you, give differently, evangelise differently and administrate differently - all to the glory of God.  And the church should definitely not seek to do those things in a monochrome way.

7) I recognize in myself advantages to being laid back when it comes (for instance) to admin.  If my deadline is Friday and an emergency comes up Wednesday afternoon it does not phase me in the slightest.  In fact I'm pretty cool when Thursday goes up in smoke too.  I know that I can work close to the deadline and that does free me to serve elsewhere with less distraction / guilt / pressure earlier in the process.  I also recognize that for larger projects those with the gift of administration can serve me by setting me mini-deadlines along the way and getting me to be more forward thinking.  In this example we're all doing admin but we're doing it in line with our different giftings.  Great!

But...

8) I'm not sure Jesus made me 'ENFP'.  In fact I'm pretty sure He didn't.  I've read school reports from Australia (where I lived until I was 15) and I was hard-working, diligent, organised, focussed etc etc.  When I moved to the UK I found that I was ahead of the school curriculum by at least 18 months in every subject.  I also found that it really, really was not cool to work hard in the UK.  So I stopped.  I then went to a tertiary institution whose unofficial motto was "Effortlessly superior."  And that pretty much defined the personality idol that I sought.  Throbbing behind ENFP for me is this counterfeit motto: 'Effortlessly superior.'  I'm not purely and simply ENFP, I know in myself that I seek after such a persona, attempting to justify myself before this false god.  (I am an appallingly sinful, proud young man and I'm aware that my experience will not be the same as others.  But on the off chance that there are other who sin in these kinds of ways I offer these cautionary thoughts.)  

9) I certainly had the experience (and I know others have as well) of filling out my Myers-Briggs test and being aware that my answers conformed as much to an ideal that I nurture as they did to genuine reality.  This is what I mean about our personality types being aspirational.  There's a big part of me that wants to say 'I'm not an admin person.'  And this has nothing to do with my organizational abilities.  It is purely a kind of snobbery that says 'Admin is not rock and roll.'  Certain tasks do not conform to the image I have of myself.  And so I let them drop and I justify it saying 'I am not...'

10)  ENFP is not who I am.  ENFP has a great deal to do with sinful choices I have made in order to navigate life according to false views of identity, justification, true life.  I certainly do have a God-given temperament and I certainly do have particular spiritual gifts but I wouldn't equate that with my Myers-Briggs type.  Not at all.

 

Your example, codepoke, of doing admin in a different way from your gifted daughter is pretty much the perfect example of what I'm wanting to say.  You are well aware that just because Myers-Briggs calls you 'NFP' does not excuse you from being faithful in the tasks God has given you, rather your differentness gives you a distinct and valuable way of doing that.  And it certainly will involve, at many points, handing off things to others in the body who are gifted for it. 

If we're mature (like codepoke - I mean that!) we'll handle this with humility and joy!  Humility because we confess that these things are great things to do but that I am desperately inadequate for them.  Joy because I rejoice in the giftings of others and the Spirit-given unity we have in Christ's body.

If we're immature (like me!) we'll handle that with pride and/or despair.  Pride because deep down I'm saying 'I'm not that kind of person (whose abilities I don't greatly value anyway).'  Despair because I'd really like to be omnicompetent and not need help.

I'm sure I've overstated things in my usual soap-box style.  But you'll be aware by now that these issues lie close to some pretty strong idols for me - hence the vigourous tone and lack of nuance.  Correction and criticism always very welcome (he said in a very non-ENFP kind of way). 

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Published on Leave a comment on Tearing down the idol of my personality

In talking about 'personality types' and how they play out in the day-to-day, I've been particularly interested in how aspirational these really are.  "Out-going, big-picture, laid-back, last-minute" is not simply how I'm hard-wired (although there is something to that).  But much more, it's a fantasy construct that I've hit upon - an ideal persona in which I seek identity and life.  In other words, an idol.

I was reading Psalm 135 the other day:

 15 The idols of the nations are silver and gold, made by the hands of men. 16 They have mouths, but cannot speak, eyes, but they cannot see; 17 they have ears, but cannot hear, nor is there breath in their mouths. 18 Those who make them will be like them, and so will all who trust in them.

It got me thinking - if we become like our idols then for every 'personality type' there lies behind it an idol-personality - some 'ideal' persona.  Our natural temperaments might not be a million miles from these personas but very often we will work hard to fit ourselves into these moulds.  For some "Dependable, unflappable" is their ideal projection.  For others "never-plays-by-the-rules, unpredictable" is a more attractive idol.  But neither of these are simply given, natural, neutral personalities - to a large degree they are chosen.  And chosen as an identity by which we avoid the thorns and sew together our fig-leaves. 

In all this it becomes obvious that what we think of Jesus will be both a reflection of, and the source of, our own personality.  Since Jesus is, at base, the greatest desire of our redeemed hearts, these things will be mutually informing - our apprehension of Him and His transformation of us. (cf 2 Cor 3:18)

This alerts us to two things.  First - the the dangers of fitting Jesus into our own mould.  I will always be tempted to confuse Jesus with my personality idol.   If I'm ENFP because deep-down I desire that persona above all others, I will naturally want to see Jesus fit that type.  It will be all too easy to view Jesus through that grid.

But second, this shows us the way out of these false personas.  Namely, sticking close by the biblical Jesus and allowing Him to break down the idols of our hearts.  This will happen in two ways - I will see that Jesus is so much greater than what's good about my 'type' and He's completely different to all that's bad. 

If I think I'm a really intense person, Jesus is infinitely more so.  Can I stare down the risen Christ of Revelation 1 whose eyes blaze with fire?  If I think I'm cool under pressure, Jesus is infinitely more so.  Could I ever act the way Jesus did the night before His godforsaken execution?   

On the other hand, if I'm laid-back then I should study hard the zeal of Jesus.  If I'm rigid I should admire the flexibility of Jesus.  If I'm shy I must be challenged by the boldness of Jesus.  If I'm loud I must heed the gentleness of Jesus. etc etc 

Renounce your 'type', pick up the bible and allow Jesus to be the iconoclast of 'personality'.

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Published on 21 Comments on I am not…

Here's an example of how we shape our own "personality types" which then shape us.

I went to bible college saying very strongly both outwardly and inwardly "I'm not a linguist." Why would I say such a thing? Well not on the basis of terrible school grades or any nightmare disputes with snooty French maitre d's. When it boils down to it, my problem is this: language learning requires simple hard work - learning declensions and conjugations and endless vocab.  Basically I'd far rather invest my time finely tuning some doctrine essay than learn a list of irregular verbs. The pay-off simply seemed much greater. After all I'm a big-picture, artsy kind of guy. I'm not a linguist. (Note well the strong sense of a cultivated identity driving things).

So what happened? Well the indicative "I'm not a linguist" translated (as indicatives always do) to action. In this case: retreat from languages into other areas that I found naturally easier. So my efforts in languages were very ordinary. And guess what? So were my grades. So what did I conclude? "I'm not a linguist." These things really do become self-fulfilling.

Surely I should have been telling myself: "I am a linguist." The Lord has called me to be a teacher of His word and therefore He has equipped me to be the linguist I need to be. Whether I'll wow people with my brilliance in the subject is an entirely different (and irrelevant!) matter. The fact is, when it comes to languages no-one gets away without hard work and no-one gets to play their 'personality type' as an excuse to retreat from it. From the indicative of 'By the Lord's strengthening I am a linguist' ought to have flowed the imperative 'Be the linguist He's called you to be.' Instead I retreated into my type.

I'm fighting a similar battle at the moment with an extremely deep-seated self-identification "I don't do admin." Is this some morally neutral, hard-wired fact of my 'personality'? No, it's a sinful pattern that I've fed for years. Any help gratefully received.
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Published on 19 Comments on Personality types?

Part of my ordination training involved doing the Myers-Briggs personality test.  Now I realise that this is not strictly mandated by the Pastoral Epistles, but on the other hand it was a good old giggle. (See mildly amusing prayers for the 16 personality types here.) 

I came out quite strongly as ENFP which means I'm an inveterate procrastinator, big-picture, no-detail, scatter-brained, last-minute, wing it with a smile and talk my way out of it later kind of guy.  At this point all the ISTJs (the opposite to me on all four spectrums) are waking up to why my blog really bugs them.  (Myers-Briggs did actually help me understand my bible college experience - the majority of Anglican ministers I trained with were ISTJs).

But already you're probably sensing what everyone should know about these 'personality types.'  They're not neutral.  They describe real patterns alright - and extremely hard-wired patterns too.  But a lot of what they describe are patterns of sin.  A good part of each of the 16 'personality types' simply identify chosen, self-protective schemes that enable us to navigate a cursed world along paths of least resistance.  Whether we buy into the 'loud' or the 'shy' persona, the 'organized' or 'shambolic', we're basically doing the same thing - finding a way to make life work apart from Christ.  By some combination of retreating from the thorns and sewing our fig leaves we hit upon a style of relating that minimizes pain and maximizes self. 

Now we cluster together in different groups of sinners because there are natural contours to our make-up and unique events shaping our development.  And it's important to say that those internal and external differences are not in themselves sinful.  The new creation will not be monochrome!  And different gifted-ness is not at all something to be ironed out in the name of Christian maturity.  Our goal is not the absence of difference but the harmony of God-given distinctives. 

But still, granting that there may be good and genuine reasons for some of the following, isn't it a problem when we flinch from serving Jesus by making such claims as...

'I'm just not an extrovert.' 

'I'm not a morning person.' 

'I need order/control.'

'I'm not good with authority/structure.'

'I'm not a people-person.'

'I don't really do organization.'

Others to add??

Even as we think of these deep-seated statements of identity it should be clear that they're not just descriptive.  They are also very strongly aspirational.  I got that sense even as I took the Myers-Briggs test.  So many of the answers I gave were actually the answers that I thought the artsy, laid-back Glen should give.  In fact it was almost exactly like doing the Star Wars personality test where I tried my hardest to come out as Han Solo (but ended up as Princess Leia.  My wife was the Emporer - but that's another post).  The point is our reactions to events are partly innate but also strongly determined by the persona we'd like to hide in.

So who's identity are we hiding in and why?

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Gal 2:20)

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. 3 For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. 4 When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.  (Col 3:1-4)

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Rest of series:

I am not...

Tearing down the idol of my personality

Conclusions

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Published on Leave a comment on Fig leaves and thorns

These are not the outskirts of Eden.  **

Yet my defaut mode is to think exactly this.  I wake every morning with peace in the land, money in the bank, food in the cupboard.  I shower in clean drinking water, go to my rewarding job, drink coffee from the other side of the world.  I've lost none of my siblings, none of my close friends.  In fact all death seems to be sealed off in a sanitised compound, far from my everyday consciousness.  I have no major illnesses (that I know of).  I blog / text / download / watch the latest banal distraction.  I preach with virtually no expectation of opposition and people even thank me for bringing them the gospel. 

So this is the garden of Eden right?  At least an outer suburb, surely?

I heard Rick McKinley once comment that news footage of atrocities looks very different in the west to other places.  In the aftermath of a bombing in Palestine, the crowds are grieving.  They know what to do in these situations, they've seen it all before.  And they cry, they wail, they mourn the dead.  In the aftermath of a tragedy in the west what are the expressions of the onlookers?  Shock, disbelief, incomprehension.  And the whole sense conveyed is 'How could this happen?  These are the outskirts of Eden, right?' 

Well, no.  We've actually been exiled from the Lord's presence and the very ground beneath our feet trembles under the weight of a divine curse.  Thorns and thistles grow up for us.  Interesting to note that preposition in Genesis 3:18 - these thorns that mar all our efforts to fill and subdue the earth are not randomly placed in creation.  They are intentionally pointed at us.  The Lord rigs the whole creation for frustration (Dan Allender's phrase).  Our relationships are bent on violence and destruction.  Even, and especially, our life-giving activities (filling and subduing and child-bearing) are shot through with excruciating pain and disappointment and we live under an ominous death-sentence.  Dust we are, and to dust we will return. 

So that curse is crashing down on my head daily - and on the heads of the people I love.  But because I think I'm in a suburb of Eden, here's how I respond.  I retreat from the thorns and I piece together my fig leaves.

Put it another way - I refuse to engage in the painful toil involved in the Lord's work and instead I invest in whatever I think will make life work.  Under the ridiculous delusion that I'm entitled to Eden's ease, I take pain as a sign that I'm not where I'm meant to be (since I believe I'm meant to be in Eden).  So I shield myself from this pain - be it the frustration of admin, the vulnerability of opening up to people, the risks of leading through change.   And I seek life in other ways - through my plans, ingenuity and hard graft (my fig leaves).  All this assumes that I'm basically in the Garden (at least in the outskirts).  I tell myself there's no reason for me to engage in pain, and every possibility I can make this world work.  But this is not Eden and I must not be shocked by the thorns nor retreat from them.  Neither should I think that I can press through them to life.  Equally I must not cover myself in my own righteousness, nor think that life exists in such efforts.

Dante had the words "Abandon all hope ye who enter here" written above the gates of hell.  Actually the words above this land east of Eden could say something pretty similar: "Abandon all hope ye who live here - except for Christ."  There is no hope for us, no hope for making life work, no hope for avoiding the curse.  There is Christ only.  Nothing we put our hope in will work.  Not finally.  But we engage in His work, in all its pain.  We renounce our own coverings and trust in Christ alone.  And we wait for the new heavens and the new earth - for that is the home of righteousness.   

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** btw I'm using 'Eden' as a shorthand for 'the Garden of Eden' - Paradise.  I realise that the Garden was in Eden - a larger area (cf Gen 4:18).  So I'm begging a little artistic license here.

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Published on Leave a comment on Go and preach the gospel…

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... TO OTHER CHRISTIANS!

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Here's my ill-considered overstatement of the issue:  Our problem is not that we aren't telling the gospel to our pagan friends.  It's that we don't tell the gospel to our Christian friends!

When's the last time you looked another Christian in the eye and said 'Mate you're a sinner.  I know you have struggles, I know you're tired but, deep down you're wicked!  That's your real problem.  But Mate - you're clothed in the righteousness of Christ, carried on His heart before the Father, rejoiced over in the presence of the angels.'

I don't mean, When's the last time you talked about the toughness of the Christian life, or the state of the nation's morals or the soundness of certain bible teaching etc etc.  I'm talking about eye-balling your brother or sister and speaking God's word direct to them - His blood was for you, you are clean!

We all struggle to muster up the courage to evangelise non-Christian friends and family.  But I wonder whether a significant part of our difficulty is that we're not even used to speaking the gospel to people who should welcome it!

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Published on Leave a comment on The Evangelical Warrior

Had to chuckle at this from Jonny Long's Grace4Life webiste:

 

In case you can't quite make it out, it's

  • The Helmet of Pride
  • The Sword of the Tongue
  • The Shield of Defensiveness
  • The Belt of Self-Protection
  • The Breastplate of My Own Righteousness
  • The Shoes of Busyness

Which is your favourite?

Any to add?

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Published on Leave a comment on Having a stake in your theological position

Bobby writes here about the dangers inherent in confessionalism

I particularly liked this phrase:

I’m not saying that our various traditions and confessions aren’t important, but that “our” stake in those confessions is unimportant.

It's so true that we have a stake in our theological positions and Christian labels.  We find identity in the alignments we make within the body.

This is what can make Christian blogging so darned nasty at times!  Let's be honest - there's a lot of unChristian-ness on Christian blogs.  Why?  Well a lot of it is because we're not just discussing ideas out there.  We have a stake in our positions.  We justify ourselves through our theology.  We have bought into our tribe and our tribal identity.  We know where we stand in the world because we wear the colours...  And this bozo over here is flying a different flag.  And it's so hard to hear what they say because they're not dressed up as one of you.  It's easier simply to shout out "You're a blue tribe, I'm a red tribe."  But what has that achieved?  Only to re-inforce our party-spirit, to demonize and to distract our attention from the actual content of our Christian witness.  

Paul faced exactly this with the Corithians:

"I am of Paul"  "No, no, I am of Apollos" (1 Cor 3:4).

The "I" is very prominent here. We beat our chests and find strength in our parties.  

And Paul's answer? 

"You are Christ's!" (v23) "And in Him, Paul and Apollos are yours! (v22). 

When you understand you don't belong to Christian teachers or factions but to Christ, there's a tremendous liberation.  I'm not a "red tribe" man.  I belong to Jesus.  "The LORD is my banner" (Ex 17:15)

And free from the need to beat my tribal drum I can see Paul and Apollos and Cephas for who they are - just servants of Christ.  I don't belong to them, they belong to me.  Everything they say is mine in Christ.  All their good stuff doesn't belong to them, it belong to Christ and in Christ it's mine. 

We don't have a stake in our theological positions.  We belong only to Jesus.  Every other position belongs to us. 

21 So then, no more boasting about men! All things are yours, 22 whether Paul or Apollos or Cephas or the world or life or death or the present or the future--all are yours, 23 and you are of Christ, and Christ is of God.  (1 Cor 3:21-23)

 Here's a sermon of mine on exactly this point: 1 Corinthians 3

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Published on Leave a comment on Responding to sin

How should we respond to sin in our lives?

One response is to think 'Come on Glen, I'm better than that.'

Another is to think 'Come on Glen, Christ is better than that.'

The first may produce a very moral life.  But the devil is more than happy to concede to you a Christ-less morality.  Self-righteousness is a far muddier swamp than unrighteous living.  I am not better than my sin.  I am not even better than the foulest evil I've imagined.

Instead, when I sin I am revealed as the person I've always been.  Psalm 51:5 has often struck me.  Here is David with blood on his hands.  Yet his confession is that the man who committed adultery and murder is the man he had always been.

We think when we've sinned that it was just a blot on our otherwise acceptable record.  The word of God says our sins simply express the person we have always been (Matt 7:17f). My gross sins are not 'out of character' - they are me with the hand-brake off.

No sin can shock me.  Not my own, nor the sins of my brothers and sisters who confess to me.  If the blood of God was shed for my sin (Acts 20:28) - then my sin is infinitely heinous.  No, I'm not better than sin.  But Christ is. 

This is true in two senses. 

First it's true in the sense that Christ is more desirable than sin.  In the wilderness of temptations, Satan can only offer me a bucket of salt.  Christ always stands before me with living waters (John 4:10; 7:38; Rev 7:17).  The father of lies tells me life is found in this sin.  Jesus tells me it's a broken cistern that can hold no water.  Only His waters are truly life-giving. (Jer 2:12-13)  I forsake even my precious sins because I have learnt that Jesus is more desirable.

But Christ is better than sin in another, much more important, sense.  For He is the good person that I fail to be.  He is the reality that stands before the holy Father - not my sin. 

My sin, though it clings to my bones and sinks to the depths of my heart, does not define me, Christ does.  When the Father looks to find me, He does not look in the record that stands against me (Ps 130:3; Col 2:14).  He looks to His Beloved Son and finds me hidden there. 

Which means even as the diseased tree of my flesh produces in me the very worst fruit, Christ is my Plea, my Status, my Righteousness.  Even as the chief of sinners, even in the act of my worst rebellion, Christ - the One who is infinitely better - defines me and not my sin.

So Christ is better in both these senses.  But - and here's where this post has been heading - without being utterly convinced of this latter sense, the former sense could easily lead to a Pharasaism not unlike the 'I am better than sin' response.

How so?

Well if I respond to sin simply by saying 'Jesus is more desirable' it basically throws me back on myself.  I am left with my own heart and its ability to desire Jesus.  The work of annihilating sin becomes simply my work of destroying my heart idols.  The work of liberation is simply the work of my affections desiring Christ with sufficient ardour.  Where is the locus of this redemption?  Me.

Now do my heart-idols need crucifying?  Yes.  Do I need Christ uppermost in my affections?  Yes.  But by golly, if I found it hard to reform my outward behaviour - how hard is it going to be to reform my inner world??!  Impossible.

So, you say, that's why we need the gracious work of the Spirit and diligently to employ the means of grace, etc, etc.  Well... there's a time and a place for that.  But let's think.  If that's our bottom line, doesn't it sound exactly like the Catholic view of grace?  "It's all of grace" says the Catholic "... supernatural, infused grace worked in us, with which we cooperate, making us better and better over time."  Doesn't that sound very similar to "We fight sin by enflaming our affections for Christ - flames stoked by the Spirit via His means of grace"?  

It's not that there's no place for the 'Christ is more desirable' approach.  It's that we must recognize it's true place - i.e. after we're assured of the extrinsic work of Christ.  "Grace" is not basically a supernatural empowerment to work at my salvation or to enflame my Christian affections.  "Grace" is the work of Christ alone on behalf of sinners who contribute nothing.  (This is similar to the points I made here - grace is not so much the bread David provides as the victory David wins).

Therefore my first reponse to sin is this - even in the very midst of sin, Jesus has been carrying me on His heart before the Father.  Even ensnared in the darkest selfishness, the Spirit has been calling 'Abba' from within me.  Even as my heart desired worthless idols, the Father loved me even as He loves Christ.

This is the truth that really changes us.  It reveals to us that not even our sin can separate us from the love of God in Christ.  We realize again that our darkness is not a locked basement to the Lord.  Even our self-willed rebellion cannot remove us from His embrace.  We sin in His face - this drives us down in contrition.  And at the same time He is lifting us up to the Father. 

The truth that really changes us is that our lives are not our own.  Jesus has taken possession of us in spite of ourselves and wills to do us eternal good.  The Spirit of sonship is already praying 'Abba' in you.  The affections you are so keen to enflame are already ablaze - and that, even as you quench Him!   

Now surrender.  Now be conquered. Now receive what is entirely beyond you.  And see if you don't love Him with renewed and supernatural vigour!  But don't begin with your heart for Christ.  Begin with His heart for you.

We love because He first loved us. 1 John 4:19

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Published on Leave a comment on What changes the heart?

Tim VB put me onto this 9 week course about Gospel Centred Living which is freely available here.  It looks great.  They draw on material from World Harvest Mission - their Gospel Tranformation and Sonship courses.  To give you a flavour of these, here is the blurb about the Sonship course:

Sonship: Live the theology you believe!

Many of us understand the faith intellectually, but our hearts have not quite kept up with our heads. Sonship is designed to help you take some of the glorious theological truths of the gospel - truths that you may know in your head - and apply them to the nitty gritty reality of daily life.

You'll find that as the gospel re-makes you, there is greater joy and desire to share the wonderful news of God's lovingkindness with others.

I have to say I've been very impressed by what I've seen so far. 

One thing that struck me was this testimony found here in the Sonship course.  It illustrates brilliantly a truth I'll remark on at the end: 

One day when I was very young, I saw my older sister hanging up my father's white business shirts on the clothesline to dry. I was suddenly filled with the urge to hang up one of my daddy's white shirts. He was my daddy too, and I was his daughter; I loved him in my childlike way and wanted to express it. I couldn't reach the clothesline-it was too high, but I saw a wheel barrow in the yard and its handles were just the right height for me. I didn't notice how rusty it was and I rather joyfully clothes pinned the wet shirt to the handles.

When my dad got home and saw the shirt on the wheelbarrow, he became very angry with me and punished me severely for ruining his shirt. I had not realized the impact that event and others like it had made on me. However, as I was repeatedly convicted during the Sonship conference for not believing God concerning his delight in me and in the gracious nature of my relationship with him, this memory returned to me. Now, you cannot hardly get through 24 hours of a Sonship conference without realizing that your own heart is as murderous as anyone else's-so I wasn't primarily focusing on only being the innocent victim of my father's cruel anger.

As I remembered these scenes from the past, I saw that through the years I had not been believing that my Father in heaven was any different than my earthly father. I had not been listening when he described himself. In short, I hadn't been believing the gospel, that by faith in Christ and his perfect atoning sacrifice, he now loves me, and is forever for me and delighted in me. In Christ, he has made me beautiful and pleasing to him forever.

So the next morning I told our counselor that I thought I was beginning to understand. I told him the memory and said that I guess if the Father saw me standing next to the wheelbarrow with the ruined shirt on it, he would forget the shirt and hug me. "You still don't understand fully," Jeff said. "God would not overlook the shirt, but take it, put it on, and wear it to work. And when someone commented on the rust marks, he would say, ‘Let me tell you about my little girl and how much she loves me.'" I was overwhelmed with that realization.

What a brilliant picture of the gospel!  Not just overlooking the shirt - wearing the shirt and celebrating his daughter!

Often we think of the gospel as God overlooking our sin, tolerating our presence and simply relenting from judgement.  We are left in the law court, the not-guilty verdict is passed and we're just relieved to have avoided hell.  But can such a gospel change our hearts?  Somewhat, I'm sure.

But the good news is not that God allows us to live in the suburbs of His presence.  We are adopted, indwelt, sung over, glorified, rejoiced in.  Letting the Father love us in Christ is the kind of 'overwhelming' that truly changes.

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