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Just what is a “marriage” anyway?

From Cranmer, his commenters and some disturbing web research:


Woman marries fairground ride

woman marries ride


“I love him as much as women love their husbands and know we’ll be together forever.”


In other news:

Woman Marries Dolphin

dolphin marriage

Dressed in a white dress, a veil and pink flowers in her hair, Sharon Tendler got down on one knee on the dock and gave Cindy a kiss. And a piece of herring.  "It's not a perverted thing. I do love this dolphin. He's the love of my life," she said


Woman marries Berlin Wall

mrs berlin wall

"The Great Wall of China's attractive, but he’s too thick – my husband is sexier."

While the rest of mankind rejoiced when the Wall, erected by the Soviets in 1961 to halt an exodus from East to West Berlin, was largely torn down in 1989, its "wife" was horrified.

She's never been back and now keeps models depicting "his" former glory.

She said: “What they did was awful. They mutilated my husband."

She is said to have shifted her affections to a nearby garden fence.


Woman Marries Eiffel Tower



Erika La Tour Eiffel, 37, a former soldier who lives in San Francisco, has been in love with objects before. Her first infatuation was with Lance, a bow that helped her to become a world-class archer, she is fond of the Berlin Wall and she claims to have a physical relationship with a piece of fence she keeps in her bedroom.  But it is the Eiffel Tower she has pledged to love, honour and obey in an intimate ceremony attended by a handful of friends.


Man marries dog

India Man Weds Dog

The wedding took place at a Hindu temple in Tamil Nadu state. The "bride" wore an orange sari with a flower garland and was fed a bun to celebrate. Superstitious people in rural India sometimes organise weddings to animals in the hope of warding off curses.


The point here is not to make fun of those who clearly struggle with deep issues.  We all would want to help these people.  But our first thoughts as to how to help them would not, I suggest, be to 'normalize' these unions as healthy and legitimate marriages.

The point here is our definition of marriage.  Are these 'marriages'?  If not - then let London Mayor, Boris Johnson's logic compel you:.

"If gay marriage was OK - and I was uncertain on the issue - then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be consecrated between three men, as well as two men; or indeed three men and a dog."



0 thoughts on “Just what is a “marriage” anyway?

  1. Gav

    Love the sinner and hate the sin I suppose.

    There is alot of focus in Australia at the moment with gay marriage.

    The best man at my wedding is gay. I havent really seen him since I believed Jesus. I dont expect that he would change if I just walked up and tell him that he needs to turn. I think the only thing I could do is tell him about my journey and what I believe and continue to love him.

    I've gotta be honest though: I was completely grossed out a couple of times with this post (esp with the dog!)

  2. Glen

    Yeah - this isn't about homosexuality in general. It's about what is marriage. And one thing it aint (among many other distortions) is two dudes.

  3. Tim Cairns

    I am horrified, it seems that the Berlin Wall has cheated on his wife with the wife of the Eiffel Tower.

    The shock of it all!

  4. Glen

    Thankyou Tim, if anyone was going to enjoy a good ole pun it was going to be you. I can hear Emma right now pleading with you not to encourage me further.

  5. Otepoti

    I was aware of Hindu dog marriages; the last time I saw it reported a little girl of 7 was the partner. It horrified me to wonder what her future marriage prospects might be, or whether she would be held to this "marriage" and likely penury.

    How weak our criticism of such abuse tends to be.

    It reminds me of how roundly Amy Carmichael was criticised by the British East India Company for interfering with the local culture when she rescued temple prostitutes.

    As to the others, whose unions are purely voluntary, how can we Western Christian women have failed so signally to show what a Christian marriage can be?

    (Looks in shed for old sacks; rakes fireplace for ashes.)

  6. shikha

    i m quite impressed and also shocked.abt tht indian man marrying a dog its quite true as indian people think so

  7. Pingback: Questions of Faith 1 « Christ the Truth

  8. bbbbarry

    We are indeed living in an era of madness: a marriage is a covenant; a contract. Missing in many arguments one way and another is this simple fact. You can't have a contract with a dog or with a tower. You *can* with an adult of sound mind.

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